Tag Archives: take risks

40 … and counting…

40 and counting

Ok so I just celebrated my 40th birthday on August 12th and now that I’m 40, here are a few things that I’ve learned about life and myself…

  1. Friends change. People change. I change. God doesn’t.
  2. People love you the best they know how
  3. I’m still evolving. I haven’t arrived just yet. 🙂
  4. I’m still learning who I am and who I’m becoming. I am loving who I am becoming.
  5. People suck sometimes. They don’t turn out to be who you thought
  6. Life sucks sometimes. It doesn’t turn out to be what you thought
  7. There’s nothing wrong with rest or naps. (if you know anything about me, you know I love naps)
  8. Asking for or receiving help doesn’t make any less of a person/woman
  9. I’m stronger than I give myself credit for
  10. I’m good (really good) at what I do and it’s ok to toot my own horn and know my worth.
  11. I’ve done good work in this world.
  12. I still have more work to do.
  13. God is faithful and His grace is sufficient.
  14. You get what you allow.
  15. Boundaries are everything.
  16. Quiet time is everything.
  17. I’m honored and blessed to be a wife and a mom. Some people may never experience that.
  18. People pleasing and seeking the approval of others is NO-NO.
  19. I no longer care what you think.
  20. What God thinks is more important.
  21. What you do isn’t who you are.
  22. Learn to learn who you are more than what you do.  I am learning this everyday.
  23. Sometimes the people closest to you won’t get it. Love them anyway. Find people who do get it.
  24. We all make mistakes. Some small. Some really, REALLY BIG!
  25. Grant people the same grace you’d want if you’re BIG mistakes were out on front street.
  26. I now know that I can forgive for me, but not tolerate you.
  27. Forgiveness doesn’t mean I have to allow you back into my space.
  28. I’m not perfect (just in case you didn’t know) and I don’t have to be.
  29. Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs I’ve ever had.
  30. Saying no is a complete sentence.  No explanation is needed.
  31. I mean what I say.
  32. Trust the process even when it sucks.
  33. I absolutely adore my husband.  He gets me. He listens and hears even when I think he doesn’t.
  34. I don’t always like my husband, but he gets me.
  35. He doesn’t always like me, but I get him.
  36. Take yourself serious, but don’t take yourself so serious.
  37. When God is in it, it always works out of your good.
  38. I don’t have to do it because you want me to. I do have a choice!
  39. I don’t think I’ve ever thought about what life would look like at 40.  But I’m already thinking about what I want it to look like at 50. 😉
  40. People mean well, but many of them are more talk than walk.

 

BONUSES Life Lessons (I couldn’t stop at 40):

  1. I prefer quiet time. Tea. Snuggles on the couch rather than being around a lot of people.
  2. I think I am what they call and Ambivert. I’m both introvert and extrovert.  I like people but I need to be alone. I’m a beast when I have to be (on stage, teaching, preaching, etc.) but then I need quiet time to recharge.
  3. I’ve learned to get out of my own way. I can be my own worst enemy sometimes.
  4. Stop overthinking everything.
  5. Progression not perfection. It will never be perfect. Done beats perfect everyday.
  6. I’ve wasted lots of time thinking about getting ready to get ready.
  7. Sometimes you just have to do and figure it out as you go.
  8. Marriage only works if you work it.
  9. Parenting only works if you work it and sometimes it doesn’t when you are raising a four-year old.
  10. Balance doesn’t exist.  It’s whatever you make it to be.
  11. Being a Mom, Wife, Adjunct Instructor, Entrepreneur, Ministry Leader (and any other role I have) is hard some days.  Some days I want to hide up under a rock.
  12. Never assume people know what you need. Tell them. Thats why it’s called communication. Still learning this… Honey should know exactly what I’m thinking all ALL TIMES… right? 😉 nope… lol

 

Ok.. ok… ok… I’m done. 🙂

I could most assuredly go on but I won’t.

So many life lessons learned that we could be here all day.  I hope you enjoy what I shared.  Let me know in the comments section or tweet me which lesson you connected with the most. You should know that on the eve of my 10th wedding anniversary (8.19.16), so some of these could go into a married life – life lessons post, but overall they are still life lessons.

Until Next Time…

Hug + Love + Prayers

P.S. If any of the messages I share are hitting home, make sure you tweet me, share a post on facebook or comment here on my blog.  Let me know you are reading and hit me up to give a girl some love.

Register for my #LifeScope Master Class: Crush Procrastination – Get Started & Stop Stuntin’  Wednesday, August 31,2 016 – 8:30PM EST. Investment: $37.00. Register at http://www.trueheartspeaks.com/events.

Conflict schedule? Replay will be emailed to all who register.

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If this message resonated with you and you are ready to take action but need help, schedule a 45-minute Pick My Brain Strategy Session to brainstorm and create strategies to help get you moving. Click here to get more information and to schedule your session.

Ready to get out of your own way and get to the business of living but need to support of your sister-friends?  Join me and a host of other fabulous women in the #iSpeakLife Society Private FB Group for Women of Faith desiring to Live Purposefully and Grow Spiritually. bit.ly/ispeaklifesociety

Join me every Monday – Thursday at 7:15am EST for the Morning #LifeScope on periscope or Facebook. Each morning I am sharing tools, tips & strategies to help you live purposefully and grow spiritually. I also share inspirational messages to help get out of your own way and get you through the day.  For the month of August, we are chatting all about Procrastination.

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Try again… It may not work the first time

Try Again

Ok so I’m back talking more about my grass and how I’m trying to be intentional in doing the work.  Well let me let you in on a little secret… this isn’t the first time we’ve tried to create our own version of green grass like our neighbor. You see it’s been a few years that we’ve been at it but the one thing that’s been a constant, is that we’ve been inconsistent. We didn’t achieve our green grass dream on the first, second or even third try.

I’m not sure which try we are on now but I’m determined to do better this time around.

What about you?

Have you given up because it didn’t work out the first time like you thought it would?

I know we get these super duper ambitious goals and think that once we put ourselves out there, everything will line up and work out.

NOT SO!

I’ve learned that sometimes it’s not supposed to work out the first time. Sometimes you’ve got to put some sweat equity in the game to see any results. Some people quit when the going gets tough. They punk out. They say it wasn’t for them. Or it just wasn’t meant to be. Or maybe it just wasn’t God’s time. Now that may be the case but just because it wasn’t or isn’t Gods time, does mean it’s an excuse to quit.

Honey and I could easily just say we don’t have the time or the energy or the resources. We could also wait until we move into our ‘dream house‘ with our ‘dream yard‘ but that means nothing if we treat it the same way we are treating our current grass.

  • Are you waiting on some day?
  • Are you waiting for your greater while ignoring and and neglecting your season of lesser?

Be mindful that God won’t bless you with more if you haven’t learned to take of and be grateful for what you have. {Tweet This}

Listen I get it. You know you were created for greatness. You know there’s more to life than what you’re experiencing right now. But you have to be intentional and committed to the process, not just the promise.

You can’t have the promise without the process, nor elevation without transformation. {Tweet This}

It just doesn’t work that way. Sometimes it won’t work out on the first try. Sometimes it won’t work at all. Sometimes God is building resilience in you. Sometimes he wants to see how committed you will be when you find out it’s harder than you thought or when it’s more than what you bargained for.

  • Will you stay the course?
  • Will you try again?
  • Or will you give up?

Honey and I are committed to getting the green grass we dream and talk about. We are committed to doing the work, buying the supplies, and working with what we have.

What about you?

Your assignment:

Until Next Time…

Hug + Love + Prayers

P.S. If any of the messages I share are hitting home, make sure you tweet me, share a post on facebook or comment here on my blog.  Let me know you are reading and hit me up to give a girl some love.

If this message resonated with you and you are ready to take action but need help, schedule a 45-minute Pick My Brain Strategy Session to brainstorm and create strategies to help get you moving. Click here to get more information and to schedule your session.

Ready to get out of your own way and get to the business of living but need to support of your sister-friends?  Join me and a host of other fabulous women in the #iSpeakLife Society Private FB Group for Women of Faith desiring to Live Purposefully and Grow Spiritually. bit.ly/ispeaklifesociety

Join me every Monday – Thursday at 7:15am EST for the Morning #LifeScope. Each morning I am sharing tools, tips & strategies to help you live purposefully and grow spiritually. I also share inspirational messages to help get out of your own way and get you through the day.  For the month of July, we are studying and discussing the Book of Proverbs.

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What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting for-

So a few weeks ago, I challenged you to get out of your own way and start living with intention. My message stressing the fact that tomorrow is not promised was a clarion call to you to stop waiting on tomorrow.

With that being said, my message today is a continuation of the previous message. This past Friday, my hubby and I celebrated the life of friend that passed away who was 42 leaving behind his wife and ten year old son. Yes, crazy right!  It is very hard for me to think about raising my four-year-old son without his daddy but this will not be the reality for a set of four year old twins and now a 10 year old boy.

Some of you may have seen my facebook posts or you’ve heard me talk about it on facebook live or periscope but another husband and father left this world sooner than we would have like him to.  I won’t get into all of the specifics but I want to ask if you are living at your fullest capacity and if not, why?

What are you waiting for?  

I was at a Vision Book Party last weekend and a question was posed by one of the ladies and she asked about timing regarding the manifestation of dreams/goals. She basically wanted to know if there was a deadline on dreams and if she has missed her time.  As the conversation concluded, I simply asked her, “What are you waiting for?” and I will again ask you the same question.

What are you waiting for?  

After the sudden deaths of two really good people, there is an urgency for me to operate at my fullest capacity and do what really makes my heart smile.  I feel a sense of imperativeness to go full steam ahead to do what I know God has called me to do.  I will be 40 in a few months and although I know that God knows what He’s doing, I would hate to leave this world not having lived this life with a fullness and vibrancy that only I know can live it.

What about you? 

I mean really, time is of the essence and tomorrow is most assuredly not promised, so what will you do about it?

  • Will you start writing the book?
  • Will you work to clear up your credit?
  • Will you start taking better care of yourself?
  • Will you start the blog?
  • Will you schedule the doctor’s appointment.
  • Will you start the business or the ministry or the not for profit?
  • Will you clear the clutter?
  • Will you apply for the job?
  • Will you update your resume?
  • Will you fill out the application for school?
  • Will you go on that vacation that you keep dreaming about?
  • Will start saving for the vacation so you can actually make it a reality?

Will you just get started already or will you continue to let whatever is holding you back, keep you stuck, stalled and stagnant for another day, week, month, year or two years, like the woman who asked the question at the Vision Book Party?

Let me say this, if you are saying “Detra, I just don’t have time. I have too many other things going on in my life,” then you are focused on the wrong things and you need to reassess your priorities. You should only be giving those things that are highest priority to you, your time and energy. The problem is many of us are giving our time and energy to those things that drain and distract us from the essentials. Stop it!  If you struggle with this, get my Time Hacks for Busy Women training and workbook to help you start planning your day and your life around those things that matter most to you. (It’s 20% off until 5/25. Use the code: PMD16)

Listen, I trust God and believe that when our time is up, it’s in God’s timing. But what I won’t do is waste time while on this earth, letting my fear, my past, my present, people, or anything else keep me from living my best life. I read a book (I can’t remember which one) that said accumulate experiences not things and that’s what I plan to do. Hubby and I went on our first filed trip together with our son over the weekend and we had a blast. I don’t just want to work well, I want to live well and love big.

I am not sure what you are waiting on, but I challenge you to get out of your own way and get to the business of living. There is a group of people who are assigned to you who are waiting on you while you wait on … {you fill in the blank}.

Will you keep them (and yourself) waiting?


Don’t just work well. Live well and love big.
@TrueheartSpeaks

Click to Tweet this


Your assignment:

If you didn’t do what I asked you to do from a few weeks ago, I want you to stop thinking about those things you’ve wanted to do but kept putting off and DO THEM! Start making time for the things that matter most to you. Stop waiting until ‘tomorrow.’ Take action today. I am not sure what you are waiting on but you have everything you need right now at this very moment to take your next best step. DO IT!
Until Next Time…
Hug + Love + Prayers

P.S. If any of the messages I share are hitting home, make sure you tweet me, share a post on facebook or comment on my blog.  Let me know you are reading and hit me up to give a girl some love.

If this message resonated with you and you need strategies to help you get out of your own way and take action, schedule a Pick My Brain Strategy Session to chat about what’s holding you back, what you are waiting on and why you haven’t gotten started. Click here or click the image below to get more information and to schedule your session.

Ready to get out of your own way and get to the business of living?  Join me and a host of other fabulous women in the #iSpeakLife Society Private FB Group for Women of Faith desiring to Live Purposefully and Grow Spiritually. bit.ly/ispeaklifesociety

Join me every Monday – Thursday at 7:15am EST for the Morning #LifeScope. Each morning I am sharing tools, tips & strategies to help you live purposefully and grow spiritually. I also share inspirational messages to help get out of your own way and get you through the day.  For the month of May, we will be talking about MINDSET.

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Tomorrow is not promised

{I shared this with the ladies in my private fb group yesterday and wanted to share this my readers and TrueheartSpeaks Community}

Tomorrow is not promised

Tomorrow is not promised and many of you are waiting on ‘tomorrow.’ I don’t know what your assignment is nor do I know who God has assigned to you but what I do know is that a friend died at 39 yesterday (April 29, 2016). Yes 39! I trust God’s timing and I pray my friend, William, knew the lord but what I love is the impact he made on those around him. I’m enjoying reading all of the posts on Facebook from those he knew.

Many of you have let the enemy lock you in a corner and make you think that your life, experiences, your flaws, your failures, your successes (because of course they can’t be that big or that fabulous compared to {insert person or trait you compare yourself to}) don’t mean a thing in this big ole world. Well honey let me tell you that YOU MATTER.

Let me tell you that if you are awake today, you have purpose and there is a reason you are still here. I don’t know why God called him home at 39 but I’m thankful to be here at 39. I don’t know what my tomorrow holds but I know I’m going to kick every door in and knock every wall down that the enemy would build to try to keep me from and sabotage what God has for me.

Some of you are saying “I’m too young” and others are saying “I’m too old.” Well many are saying William was too young to die and my question is…

Are you too young or too old to live?

I would say NO.

I would say that today is the perfect day for you to start being intentional with the life God has given you. Today is the last day of our monthly discussion on the topic of fear {every month we talk about new topic in the #iSpeakLife Society} but it won’t be the last time we will talk about it. Fear has paralyzed many of us into inaction. We talk a good game but do nothing!

I know you loved prince’s music and you thought he was the best thing since sliced bread but my question is what will folks have to say about you.

  • Can you say you’re giving it your all?
  • Can you say you’re putting 120% in?
  • Can you say that your living instead of existing?

No more excuses.

No more reasons why you can’t.

Stop complaining and do something.

God has given us EVERYTHING we need to get started today or to keep going if we’ve already taken the plunge.

Either way… As big as they may seem, nothing and no problem, challenge, or struggle is bigger than not waking up tomorrow to do what you keep saying you’re going to do today.

Let’s go!

Let get it!

Let’s turn this world (whichever part God has assigned you to) upside down.

Let’s move in spite of our fears!

Let’s make some things happen.

Let’s leave a legacy our family and friends and most important God would be proud of.


Tomorrow is NOT promised and
many of you are waiting on ‘tomorrow.’
DO IT TODAY!

Click to Tweet this


Your assignment:

Think about those things you’ve wanted to do but kept putting off. Create some time to DO THEM! You know those family and friends you’ve been saying you’re going to call or visit, create time to CALL or VISIT THEM!  You know that ‘thing’ you’ve saying you wanted to do or start, DO IT! Start making time for the things that matter most to you and then start doing it. Stop waiting until ‘tomorrow.’ Now here is the kicker… don’t just make plans, I want you to follow through on them.

Until Next Time…

Hug + Love + Prayers

P.S. If any of the messages I share are hitting home, make sure you tweet me, share a post on facebook or comment on my blog.  Let me know you are reading and hit me up to give a girl some love.

If this message resonated with you and you need strategies to help you create and implement a life purpose plan to do all those things you’ve been thinking about doing, let’s schedule a Pick My Brain Strategy Session to chat about what’s holding you back. Click here.

Ready to get out of your own way and get to the business of living?  Join me and a host of other fabulous women in the #iSpeakLife Society Private FB Group for Women of Faith desiring to Live Purposefully and Grow Spiritually. bit.ly/ispeaklifesociety

Join the #iSpeakLife Society fbcvr (2)

Join every Monday – Thursday at 7:15am EST for your Morning #LifeScope. Each morning I am sharing tools, tips & strategies to help you live purposefully and grow spiritually. I also share inspirational messages to help get you through the day.  For the month of April, we will be talking about FEAR.

Not on Periscope? Download the periscope app on your phone. Search for me (TrueheartSpeaks). Follow me. Turn notifications on so you are notified whenever I am on Live.  Then be on the lookout when I’m live.

{NOTE: I’m offline the first three days of the month, therefore I will be back on periscope on Wednesday}

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Be Sensitive

I sent this to my e-Zine list last week and decided to share it with you.

Just simply posting my thoughts on

I am feeling pretty humble… at peace and just loving God more and more. I am sitting at my desk preparing for my class in a few minutes but I wanted to quickly share with you the most awesome experience I had this morning while getting my breakfast at Tim Hortons.

I had the opportunity to speak life, healing and hope into a women today whom I did not know. I am a huge and faithful follower of Bishop TD Jakes (world-renowned teacher, pastor, preacher, entrepreneur, etc). I normally watch his services rebroadcast during week. I watched it yesterday and thought…that was a good ole message I really want to listen to it again. Well as I fast forward the recording to his message, my spirit said no go back and listen to the worship song that they were singing. The song says… “I am healed by the word of God. I am healed by the word of God. Yes it’s already done, I’m just waiting for my change to come. But I know I’m healed by the word of God.” So I listened to it 2 or 3 times and even while I was in the Tim Hortons line.

I pay for my order and I step the side to wait for my sandwich. I notice a woman with a beautiful ring on. I give her a compliment. She says thank you but says something that doesn’t sit well with me. She says “thank you, my mom gave it to me. Something like this would never come from a man. I am not married and don’t want a husband.” Well as we began to talk she was dealing with some health issues, has been surrounded by negativity and turmoil (which is where her negative language was coming from).

But as I began speaking in to her life that song rang loud in my spirit. I knew at that point that I was on assignment. God had me listening to that song to prepare me to minister to and speak words of life and encouragement into Cee Cee (that was her name). With tears in her eyes after I finished praying with her… she said that she knew our meeting was not by happen stance. She confirmed that the words I spoke over her were things that she has been dealing with.

I don’t share this with you to boast but to share that if you open yourself up God can you use to be a blessing to someone who is waiting for you to share your gifts, talents, and call. Don’t be ashamed or fearful. God is ready use you if you are ready to be used. The question is will you be sensitive enough to the movement of God’s spirit to nudge you.

The crazy part about this story is that I was initially going to go somewhere different for my breakfast. But I was lead to go to that particular Tim Hortons.

Be open.

Be ready.

Be sensitive to the move of God.

Let Him blow your mindlike He did for me this morning.

On another other… click here to listen to the song… listen to it, meditate on it, let it get deep into your spirit and know that whatever you may be dealing with, God is able to heal you.

YES… you are healed by the word of God.

It is already done.

Just wait for your change to come.

Manifestation is coming.

Will you be ready?

P.S. Don’t forget to Join me on Tuesday at 6pm for the Monthly Life Purpose Coaching Call. Get call in details at www.trueheartspeaks.com

I Love you.

I am praying with and for you.

Live. Love. Lead in and on purpose

Hugs…
Detra

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Get Started

Ok so I know I have been MIA for a minute…

I have been in transition and things have been a bit crazy (but in a good way).  I will fill you in at a later date.  However, I have been working to create more video blogs in addition to writing to make sure I am reaching my Trueheart family in a myriad of ways.  So with that said a few weeks ago, I started recording Life Purpose videos with short but powerful messages to help push, propel and provoke you into your life’s purpose.

I’m really tired of people walking around unhappy and unfulfilled when of the power to change your situation and circumstances lies in your hands.  My first video was about getting started and as you will see I am still trying to master posting videos online.  But in spite of the challenges, I’m committed to sharing and doing what God tells me to do.  What about you?  Will you get out of your own way and just do it.  No matter what the outcome, just take the first step.  Sometimes it’s not about the outcome but more about if you have the courage to just launch out into the deep (or even the shallow) end of purpose and do what you know in your heart of heart you should be doing.

Remember you don’t have to be great to get started but you do need to get started to be great.  So check out the video and be sure to leave me a comment to let me know what you think as well as share it with those you think would be blessed by watching the video.

Get Started

 

Until next time….

Choose to live in and on purpose!

Hugs…

Detra
Life Purpose Generator – Speaker | Coach | Consultant | Mentor
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Sure, please feel free to forward TrueheartWrites to friends and colleagues, but please forward in its entirety. TrueheartWrites is written and distributed by TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises.  Life Purpose Generator, Detra M. Trueheart is a Speaker and Life Coach. Her company, TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises, is dedicated to helping high-achieving purpose-driven women of faith break barriers in beliefs and behaviors  so they can live IN and ON Purpose with more focus, freedom, and fulfillment.  Learn how Detra can help you create a life with more clarity, confidence and conviction: http://www.trueheartspeaks.com
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Learn from FAILURE Don’t Run from It.

I was thinking of what to post this week and I happened to com across a coaching assignment that went out today for my Go Hard or Go Home 30 Day Jumpstart E-Program and decided I wanted to share it with you.  Be sure to do the assignment and share you comments with me below or on facebook or twitter.

Enjoy…

Learn from FAILURE Don’t Run from It.


Click here if you would rather LISTEN to this week’s article.

As we close out our last full week of our 30 day journey together, I want to close this week with today’s lesson, which is Learn from Failure DON’T Run from It.  Many times we are so afraid to fail and so afraid to try anything new, that we never do anything.  We run from failure instead of running towards it.  We hide behind bushes when we think failure is lurking and maybe it is lurking.  But let me tell you this, you will learn so much more from your failures than you will ever learn from your successes.  It is in your failures that your greatness is created, defined and some times refined.  Don’t let the possibility of what could ‘never’ happen keep you from trying and making it happen.  You have to learn how to confidently look the prospect of failure in the eye and move forward anyway.


You see the question isn’t if you will have problems, but how you are going to deal with your problems. We will all have things that come into our lives to shake us and make us but NEVER to break us.  What the devil meant for bad in your life, God can most assuredly turn it around for your good.  Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that ALL things work together for the good of those who love God and are the called according to His purpose.”  ALL things are working together for your good.  Trust and know that God has your best interest at heart when he allows obstacles to come your way.  Everything you are experiencing is preparing you for where you are going.  Let God shake some things up in your life.  There may be some ingredients that have settled down at the bottom that are needed to spice up your life, your purpose and your destiny. Shake them up so you can experience the FULL essence of all of the flavors you possess.

Will you fail backward or will you lean in and fail forward?  Don’t run from it… run to it and learn everything you can.  Life is all about solving problems.  You have to change your perspective when pursuing greatness.  You have to look at yourself as a problem solver.  Don’t focus on the problem, focus on the solution.  If it didn’t or doesn’t work, how can you tweak it to make it better that next go-round?  Or do you just scrap it and move it on.  Remember that learning to move on is just as important as staying around to try to fix it.  It takes wisdom to make that decision. Lastly, don’t forget to keep God in the mix.  Some things aren’t meant for you to touch, but just to experience.  If this is one of those instances, give the problem to God and keep it moving.

As the quote above implies (I’m paraphrasing), if you try, you stand a chance of losing, but if you don’t, you’ve already lost.  Stop running from it and run to it.  The very thing you are running from could be the very thing that makes all the difference in how you achieve your goals.  No you won’t know until you get knee-deep in it, but you will never know unless you try. 

Below is a little inspiration.  I have listed a few very successful people and how they failed (some tremendously) before becoming who we know them as today.  

  • Henry Ford: While Ford is today known for his innovative assembly line and American-made cars, he wasn’t an instant success. In fact, his early businesses failed and left him broke five times before he founded the successful Ford Motor Company.
  • R.H. Macy: Most people are familiar with this large department store chain, but Macy didn’t always have it easy. Macy started seven failed business before finally hitting big with his store in New York City.
  • Akio Morita: You may not have heard of Morita but you’ve undoubtedly heard of his company, Sony. Sony’s first product was a rice cooker that unfortunately didn’t cook rice so much as burn it, selling less than 100 units. This first setback didn’t stop Morita and his partners as they pushed forward to create a multi-billion dollar company.
  • Bill Gates: Gates didn’t seem like a shoe-in for success after dropping out of Harvard and starting a failed first business with Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen called Traf-O-Data. While this early idea didn’t work, Gates’ later work did, creating the global empire that is Microsoft.
  • Walt Disney: Today Disney rakes in billions from merchandise, movies and theme parks around the world, but Walt Disney himself had a bit of a rough start. He was fired by a newspaper editor because, “he lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” After that, Disney started a number of businesses that didn’t last too long and ended with bankruptcy and failure. He kept plugging along, however, and eventually found a recipe for success that worked.
  • Albert Einstein: Most of us take Einstein’s name as synonymous with genius, but he didn’t always show such promise. Einstein did not speak until he was four and did not read until he was seven, causing his teachers and parents to think he was mentally handicapped, slow and anti-social. Eventually, he was expelled from school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School. It might have taken him a bit longer, but most people would agree that he caught on pretty well in the end, winning the Nobel Prize and changing the face of modern physics.
  • Thomas Edison: In his early years, teachers told Edison he was “too stupid to learn anything.” Work was no better, as he was fired from his first two jobs for not being productive enough. Even as an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. Of course, all those unsuccessful attempts finally resulted in the design that worked.
  • Oprah Winfrey: Most people know Oprah as one of the most iconic faces on TV as well as one of the richest and most successful women in the world. Oprah faced a hard road to get to that position, however, enduring a rough and often abusive childhood as well as numerous career setbacks including being fired from her job as a television reporter because she was “unfit for tv.”
  • Fred Astaire: In his first screen test, the testing director of MGM noted that Astaire, “Can’t act. Can’t sing. Slightly bald. Can dance a little.” Astaire went on to become an incredibly successful actor, singer and dancer and kept that note in his Beverly Hills home to remind him of where he came from.
  • J. K. Rowling: Rowling may be rolling in a lot of Harry Potter dough today, but before she published the series of novels she was nearly penniless, severely depressed, divorced, trying to raise a child on her own while attending school and writing a novel. Rowling went from depending on welfare to survive to being one of the richest women in the world in a span of only five years through her hard work and determination.
  • Michael Jordan: Most people wouldn’t believe that a man often lauded as the best basketball player of all time was actually cut from his high school basketball team. Luckily, Jordan didn’t let this setback stop him from playing the game and he has stated, “I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
  • Babe Ruth: You probably know Babe Ruth because of his home run record (714 during his career), but along with all those home runs came a pretty hefty amount of strikeouts as well (1,330 in all). In fact, for decades he held the record for strikeouts. When asked about this he simply said, “Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.”
  • Steven Spielberg: While today Spielberg’s name is synonymous with big budget, he was rejected from the University of Southern California School of Theater, Film and Television three times. He eventually attended school at another location, only to drop out to become a director before finishing. Thirty-five years after starting his degree, Spielberg returned to school in 2002 to finally complete his work and earn his BA.

The people I listed above aren’t any different from you or me.  The only thing that makes them different is their decision to never let no’s and rejection keep them from their dreams, goals, aspirations and purpose.  

My question is will you?

Your Daily Coaching Assignment:
Today’s Assignment is … Since failure is inevitable, if your perception of and response to failure were changed, what would you attempt to achieve?  I mean really think about.  I am sure that there are still some things you haven’t tried or won’t try because you are afraid of failing.  What if you were still afraid of failing but knew you needed to lean into it in order to achieve the success you desire?  Take some time today and think about recent setbacks you’ve experienced.  How did you respond?  Did you let it keep you down or did you get back up?  I hope you got back up 🙂  If not, then now is the time to run toward your failures, lean into them and learn from every single one of them?  Is it scary… ABSOLUTELY but it is so worth it!
I hope you enjoyed today’s lesson..

Until next time….

Choose to live in and on purpose!

Hugs…

Detra
Life Purpose Generator – Speaker | Coach | Consultant | Mentor
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Iron Sharpens Iron

Click here if you would rather LISTEN to this week’s article.

This past week I had the opportunity to attend the Speak for Pay Conference hosted by Marshawn Evans.  Can I tell you I had time of my life!!!  As I look back, I realize that I was on assignment.  In addition to attending as a participant, my assignment included attending as someone who will be hosting her own live events and getting a clear vision of what life and business could be like for me one day.  I was expanding my vision and up leveling my current life and business.

You see the way God reveals visions and dreams to me is through experiences most times.  Some people see visions via dreams, I get mine through actual experiences.  I might show up at someone’s house and see something and the Lord will speak to me and say this is it… this is what I was referring to the other day.  Crazy right… I know …. but at any rate, from beginning to end of the event, God was showing me what is possible when I allow myself to be shifted and pushed out of my comfort zone and when I am in a space where I am with like-minded individuals.

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When we are with those who understand our struggle, our desires, and our passions, it somewhat takes the stress off of trying to explain greatness to people who just don’t ‘get’ it.  Well that’s how I felt.  I don’t know about you but when I can feel myself transitioning to the next level, I sometimes feel isolated or out of place.  However, that was not the case in Atlanta, where the event was held.  I was with a group of like-minded individuals being poured into by a mentor/coach who understood us.  Have you felt that way?  Where others didn’t really ‘get you’ or ‘get’ something you were going through or ‘get’ that dream you were pursuing?

Well sometimes you have to take the initiative the PUT yourself in environments where iron sharpens iron and birds of feather can flock together.  And not just any bird, but EAGLES.  You need someone who has been where you are going or who has experienced similar feelings and emotions in order for you to have the breakthrough you desire.  There were so many things that were confirmed while on this trip, so I knew I was in the right place.  When shifting and transitioning to that ‘next level,’ you need people in your circle, on your row and leading you who ‘get’ you.  You need iron to sharpen your iron.  Not plastic or glass, but iron.  You need people around you who are ‘like’ you.

If you are feeling a little isolated or estranged.  If you are feeling like no one ‘gets’ you. If you are in need of a coach or mentor who can really meet you where you are, you need an ‘iron sharpens iron’ experience like I had this past weekend.  If you don’t already have this in your life, you need to change it up.  Ask God to show you what changes you need to make.  Whether it’s changing your inner circle and the people on your row, do it.  Start aligning yourself with like-minded, purpose-driven, go-getters who are willing to do whatever it takes to pursue and live God’s best life.  If you need to invest in yourself by getting a coach or mentor or attending an event that will expose you to iron sharpeners, then DO IT.

  • You can’t keep waiting for them to get it; they won’t.  
  • You can’t keep waiting for the right time; it’s NOW.  
  • You can’t keep waiting for things to be perfect… NOT gonna happen.

It’s time for you to invest in yourself by surrounding yourself with WHATEVER is necessary to help provoke you into your life’s purpose.  I challenge you to make a list of things you know you need to do to start making that shift and DO one this week.  Go to an event where go getters are hanging out.  Sign up for a new training.  Be the iron that you are seeking and start sharpening those around you. If you are stuck and need help strategizing how to make the first move or take the first step, schedule a Strategy Coaching Session with me.

P.S … This month’s monthly coaching call takes place TOMORROW at 6pm.  If you are on my mailing list, no worries you are covered, but if not, then REGISTER NOW to get access to the call in details.  Tomorrow’s topic is all about getting rid of excuses.

Until next time….

Choose to live in and on purpose!

Hugs…

Detra
Life Purpose Generator – Speaker | Coach | Consultant | Mentor
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Sure, please feel free to forward TrueheartWrites to friends and colleagues, but please forward in its entirety. TrueheartWrites is written and distributed by TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises.  Life Purpose Generator, Detra M. Trueheart is a Speaker and Life Coach. Her company, TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises, is dedicated to helping purpose-driven women of faith break barriers in beliefs and behaviors  so they can live IN and ON Purpose with more focus, freedom, and fulfillment.  Learn how Detra can help you create a life with more clarity, confidence and conviction: http://www.trueheartspeaks.com
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Take the first step — TODAY!

Take the First Step TODAY

Here we are at the last and third of the three points I shared on the New Year New You 2014 Tele-Event.  Just as a recap,  the first point I shared with the women to help them live in and on purpose was to Do it Afraid.  At some point in our lives, we get to a place were we can no longer let fear get in the way of purpose and destiny.  Then I encouraged you to ‘Stop living for them and start living for YOU!’ You can not and will not be who and what God has called you to be if you continue to be what and who ‘they’ want you to be.  When you finally come to that fork in the road where you know that it’s time to walk in your uniqueness and  ‘differentness’ you need to make sure the path you take is the path designed for you by God NOT by others.

Now as we transition to the last step I gave, in order for you to do it afraid, and start living for you, you MUST take the first step TODAY!  YES… do something.

new-year-started

Most times we are waiting for the right time but that day will never come if you don’t take the first step.  I saw a sign that said ‘you can’t wait for all of the lights to turn green because they never will.’  I’m not sure who said it but it’s true.  Waiting for the perfect time to start means you will be waiting forever.  In his book, “In a pit with a lion on a snowy day,” Mark Batterson says,

‘that taking no risks is the greatest risk of all.’

He later goes on to say,

‘What sets lion chasers apart isn’t the outcome.  It’s the courage to chase God-sized dreams.  Lion chasers don’t let their fear or doubts keep them from doing what God has called them to do…. I’m absolutely convinced that our greatest regrets in life will be missed opportunities.’

You see the reason you haven’t taken the first step may not be because you are waiting for things to be perfect (or maybe it is) but that’s just the excuse that you use.  Things will never be perfect even when you get a rhythm going once you get started.  Things happen and life happens.  So expecting things to be perfect just sets you up for even more disappointment.  So let that go!  However let’s get back to what you are really covering up and deal with why you haven’t started.

Could it be that you are afraid… YES.. AFRAID…

  • afraid of failing
  • afraid of what ‘they’ might have to say about you venturing out to do something they ‘dream’ about doing but won’t attempt
  • afraid of disappointing people and yourself
  • afraid it won’t work
  • afraid it may work
  • afraid that if you quit your job and it doesn’t work, you don’t have anything to fall back on
  • afraid that the voice you hear and the tug you feel really isn’t from God

Believe me I’ve been there and once I told myself (well actually it was God) that if I didn’t try I would never know.  I took the first step. That’s right… in order to find out if it will or won’t work, you have to take the first step and you have to take it TODAY!

You will not become an expert overnight.  It takes time but it will never happen until you take the first step.  Think about it about it this way…

“The expert in anything was once a novice or a beginner.”

BBwQGTnCUAAvwFA.jpg-large

The more risks and steps you take, the easier it becomes.  Moving in spite of how you feel is called faith and faith is what drives fear right out of the way.  With each step you take, each day you build your faith and minimize your fear.  The only reason fear has so much power is because it’s what you are giving the most attention.  You’ve heard me say this (or read it it previous blog posts) what you feed grows.  If you feed fear… it will continue to paralyze and assassinate your dreams, purpose, goals and aspirations.  But when you feed faith… My GOD!  That’s when things start to happen.

Just put one foot in front of the other and take it one day, one step, one minute and one second at a time.  It’s the exact way you would eat an elephant… one bit at a time.  Maybe you’ve never heard of that before but when my coaching clients are having a hard time accomplishing BIG GOD-sized dreams and goals I ask them… how do you eat an elephant?  Either I get this strange silence on the other end of the phone or I get strange looks… because at first they aren’t sure how you would tackle something so huge. But then when I share that the answer is one bite at a time… they all say… ooooohhhhhh it makes sense now.

So here’s your assignment, think about that one goal, dream or vision (just one for now because I don’t want to overwhelm you) and ask yourself what one thing can I do today.  Then I want you to write it down and then I want you to GET YOUR BUTT MOVING!  It’s just that simple, I don’t want you to overthink it.  What one thing can you do today?  Once you’ve figured it out– DO IT!  Then share it with me below in the comments section. I want to be able to help cheer you on as you push into purpose!

Don’t wait another day. Take the first step… TODAY!

Until next time….

Choose to live in and on purpose!

Hugs…

Detra
Life Purpose Generator – Speaker | Coach | Consultant | Mentor
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Sure, please feel free to forward TrueheartWrites to friends and colleagues, but please forward in its entirety. TrueheartWrites is written and distributed by TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises.Life Purpose Generator, Detra M. Trueheart is a Speaker and Life Coach. Her company, TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises, is dedicated to helping purpose-driven women of faith break barriers in beliefs and behaviors  so they can live IN and ON Purpose with more focus, freedom, and fulfillment.  Learn how Detra can help you create a life with more clarity, confidence and conviction: http://www.trueheartspeaks.com
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Stop living for ‘them’ & START living for YOU.

StopThemStartYou

So this is the second of a three-part series on how to live in and on purpose.  In my last post, I shared with you how to Do It Afraid as one of the first steps I shared on the New Year New You 2014 Tele-event at the beginning of the year.  This post I will be sharing how to start living for you instead of them and how to be true to you.  So many people make decisions based on the response or feedback of other people.  They do something because others are doing it or they don’t do it because others are not doing it.  Others base their decisions and life’s purpose on the fear of rejection from others.

If this is you, then it’s time for you to start living for you instead of for them: let go of those people, place and things that have hindered you from living in and on purpose.  You have to get to a place where you do things not for the approval of others but because you know it is what God has instructed you to do.  Every thing God gives you won’t be popular, like-able or received by those in your circle but you have to move forward anyway.

My question for you is —

  • Are you living or just existing?  
  • Are you living for them or for you?
  • Are you being true to you?

strikingtruths_live-for-yourself1

“It is easy to live for others, everybody does. I call on you to live for yourself.”

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Listen, you will never be who God purposed for you to be until you let go of whom others expect you to be.  Much of my life was based on what my parents wanted me to do.  Now don’t get me wrong. I loved dancing and performing as well as competing in pageants, but there came a time when I felt as if it more for them instead of for me.  I will share more later in this post, but when we talk about living for you instead of living for them, make sure you are clear that it isn’t you who is holding you up instead of them.  Be sure you aren’t using ‘them‘ as the reason why you haven’t taken action, when in fact it’s not because of them, but because of YOU… your fear, your doubts, your insecurities.

February is Black History Month but it is also the month of love. This month as African Americans, Black Americans, Americans of African Descent, or whomever you consider yourself to be, I encourage you to take a really good look in the mirror and make sure that you are being true to who you were created to be. So many times we try to be who other people want us to be or who we ‘think’ others want us to be so we hide who we really are. In 2014, it is time to stop trying to keep up with the jones’, it is time to stop trying to impress people we don’t like or live with things we can’t afford or don’t want.  I am challenging you this year to live according to mantra: ‘to thine own self be true.’

For years I competed in pageants and did very well. Always winning a title or placing in the top 3, 5 or 10; however there was always one struggle. I never felt allowed to be who I really was. At that time (over 10 years ago), there was always a ‘pageant’ answer or a ‘pageant’ look I was supposed to adhere to (according to my mom and my pageant coach) and at times it became very frustrating internally because it conflicted with who I knew God created me to be. So after 8+ years of competing, I left that world to venture out to be, do & have what was true to me. I started living for me instead of ‘them.’ The journey hasn’t been easy but today as a life coach and professional speaker who operates in my areas of strength, I can say I am on my own ‘to thine own self be true’ journey.

What about you? Can you say the same? Are you living someone else’s dreams? Are you working a job you aren’t happy with? Are you in a relationship that doesn’t allow you to be you? Are you doing things just to keep up or just because it is the popular thing to do? Are you living more for them instead of living for you?

Well I am here to tell you to STOP IT!

It is time for you to take a good look in the mirror, get naked and unapologetic with yourself.  It is time for you to venture out on your own ‘to thine own self be true’ journey.

Not only just for Black History Month, but I implore you my beautiful black brothers and sisters to embrace your beautiful black skin, hair and features everyday.  The same goes for my beautiful non-black brothers and sisters. Never settle for less than what is due to you? Don’t get into a relationship or go out on a date for ‘Valentine’s Day‘ just because you are ‘lonely’ or don’t want to be the only one ‘without’ someone. Love you for you. Live for you. This is what being true to thine own self is all about — living in & on purpose and living for you instead of them. Doing what’s not popular but what’s good for you. Being intentional about your success (however you define it), your happiness, your health, your faith, your career, your relationships and your life.

YOUR TURN… I encourage you to take some time to journal and write down whether you have really been true to you or just living for others and their approval. Trust me the only approval you need is from the one who created you, God. Here are some questions to think about:

  • Am I really being true to myself?
  • If no, what changes do I need to make?
  • If yes, how can I continue to be true to myself and not be influenced by the varied changes in life and the world around me?
  • Am I allowing people, places and things to influence and change me?
  • If so, what people, places, & things do I need to get rid of or remove myself from to be in a place where I can start being true to me and living for me instead of them?
  • What does ‘to thine own self be true’ really mean to me?

Choose to live in and on purpose…

Hugs…

Detra
Life Purpose Generator – Speaker | Coach | Consultant | Mentor
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