Ok so my son will be four in September and I’ve got to say that life is definitely a roller coaster with him around. Never a dull moment. Well in addition to being a mom, I’m a wife, a daughter, tee tee to my twin nieces, entrepreneur, adjunct instructor… And just so you know there are a few other roles that I probably my missed. Well if you’re a mom like me, life isn’t always cherries and it doesn’t always go as planned.
So to help you keep from getting your panties all in a bunch, here are a few tips to help you navigate this journey of being a mom. Now whether you’re just starting out like me or have been in the game for a while, tips to help make this job of being a mom a bit easier are always helpful.
Now keep in mind, I’m most certainly no expert but what I’ve found is if I’m going through it, so is someone else. Plus sharing is caring…
Just so you know as I am working on this he is upstairs watching spiderman next to his dad while his dad is sleeping (he super duper loves his daddy).
So here goes…
- Pray: Nothing like taking every need to our God in prayer. Nothing like surrendering what we can’t do to the One who can do all things. Never stop praying and never stop taking time (even if but for 5 minutes) to get quiet and let the Lord speak to and guide you.
- Take some deep breaths: This may sound simple, but it works (and not just for giving birth – lol). I learned the power of deep breathing while is school getting my first masters degree. It relaxes you. It eases the dis-ease or uneasiness you are feeling. It also brings you back to your center and your core. Sometimes in the midst of my three-nager (yes a new term I learned) spazzing out on me, yes he has melt downs and just so I don’t melt down with him, deep breathing (and hugs from my honey) help get me through those moments.
- Let yourself off the hook: Listen, take the S off your chest and the bracelets off of your wrist (Wonder Woman) and be okay the perfection of your imperfections. I imagine that everyday won’t be perfect. I imagine that your children will make choices that you as a parent aren’t proud of, but let yourself off the hook. You are doing the best you can and even if you aren’t, the first step is acknowledging it so you can do something about it.
- Ask for help: This is huge. As mothers/parents, we sometimes feel weak and vulnerable when we have to ask for help because we feel like we should have it all together. God never asked you to have it all together. He just asks that you do your part. Are you doing your part, so that God can do His part? Understand that trying to do it by yourself is sometimes what causes the stress and anxiety that we encounter because we want others to think we have it together when we are struggling. Seek God for provision and assistance. Seek out help from those who have offered but you said no because your pride wouldn’t let you say yes.
- Talk to other moms: I found that when I talked to other moms, it wasn’t as bad as I thought and I realized I wasn’t the only one. Find some mom friends who you can talk to about what you are going through and who can relate. Don’t isolate yourself thinking it’s just you going through whatever you are going through. Open your mouth and connect with those who in the same boat as you.
- Do what works for you: Realize that as a mom you have to do what works for you. If you follow me on social media at all, you know I am big on doing what works for you. You can’t always follows the mommy/parent rules that other people have followed. You have to do what works for you and your family. You have to do what makes you and your family happy, regardless of what people have to say about it. They may not like it but you better believe, if you are stern, they will respect it. Make your own rules, create your own lines and do what works for you and yours.
- Take a day off: If you work and work and work and work and work but you never rest, you become agitated, burned out, stressed, overly emotional and much, much more. Learn to take a day off. Even if you can’t take a day off from being a mom, see if you can take a day off from work. Take a mental health day. I am a firm believer in taking care of your mind and spirit in the same way your take care of your body (that is if you take care of your body). If God worked six days and rested on the 7th day, you should follow suit.
- Stop comparing: Don’t comparing your life to someone else’s. You don’t know what they had to go through to get what they’ve got. Nor do you know if what you see is actually truth and facts. We show people what we want them to see and what you are comparing yourself to may in fact be false. Stay in your own lane and run your own race. Stop trying to compare and compete with people who aren’t even on your level or on different level because they’ve put in work that you choose not to put in (that’s another covno). Don’t compare your four children situation to someone who has two. Don’t compare your apples to someone else’s oranges. It just cause more stress to an already stressful situation.
- In order to generate and create the life of purpose you crave you have to start doing things differently and do what works for you. Take some time to figure out what really works for you and do it. Make adjustments as needed.
- Don’t isolate yourself and don’t assume you’re the only one going through what your going through. Share your journey with other moms.
- Use the tips above that I shared, especially 4 & 5.
P.S. How can I serve you? Are you overwhelmed, stressed, busier than you need to be, losing yourself while pouring into others? Let’s chat… Click here to apply for a Complimentary Life Purpose Discovery Session bit.ly/workwithDetra
P.S.S. Don’t forget to share this message with your peeps via email or social media.
Until next time…